ASK KIMBERLY...Loving Two Whats a Girl to Do?

 

Q: Dear Kimberly
I'm a single woman currently dating two men, which I'm enjoying the company of both. Is it possible to be in love with two people at the same time?

Anomalously Dating Plus 1

A: That's a great question to ask, I'm sure you feel tide between the two of them. While you may have feelings for both of the men, that's  a very strong statement to make that you think you love them both. What you're feeling may be a combination of attraction mixed with confusion because you aren't allowing yourself to be connected to just one. Trying to balance two relationships at the same time ones emotions can easily get misconstrued for something stronger, and in the end not a fair trade to yourself or the gentlemen.  I recommend taking an assessment of your real feelings by writing  five reasons for each on why you love them. I want you to truly take sometime to come up with five answers of substance verses surface. I.e: Martin is attractive. (That's a surface answer, not substance). Get down to the core of character qualities. Upon completion, please follow these 3 Steps  (1) Read once. (2) After reading place aside for three or more days, but no longer than five.  (3)  On day three re-visit your answers. I guarantee you once you place your thoughts on paper  things will become crystal clear.


Many think love is a feeling, however its an action that requires the 3C's: Character, Communication, and  Commitment. The 3C's require participation by two and UN-balanced if only one is contributing.  Try to get pass what you're feeling, because  that is clouding your judgment. Things that make us feel good aren't necessarily good for us, take the emotions out of it so you understand what the true feelings are for both gentlemen. After all is said and done and you still have strong feelings for both, the next step is be honest with both men, as  they should have the option to decide if they want to continue dating you as well. Many are confused by the word dating; the definition has  different meaning for many. Keep in mind both guys may very well know that you're seeing them both, but on the other hand they may not. These goes back to the 3C's "Character" is important in a relationship, if you have none, you can't expect to receive it in return.

Lets Chat...Have a  fashion, beauty, relationship,  or lifestyle question,  email  to Kimberly Clark  our Lifestyle Expert, and you just may see your answer here. If  you like to stay anonymous,  please mention when emailing your question over. Your privacy is our number one priority.

Until next time live FABULOUS...

~Kimberly

ASK KIMBERLY REVIEW~ALWAYS HIT ON THE WINGMAN

Always Hit On the Wingman by JAKE


America's most trusted dating columnist with GLAMOUR Magazine

Any day is a good day when the UPS man shows-up with an unexpected package. It was the most perfect rainy day. Yes, I said perfect rainy day. I love when there's nothing on the schedule and I can just kick my feet-up and relax. All that's missing is a good book. And suddenly there's a knock at the door, but by the time I get to the door. My handsome UPS driver is long gone, but leaves my package.


OK don't get to crazy now, he knew I was home. Just a note I don;t recommend this unless you & your driver have a clear understanding. Plus you must also take into consideration the Thief. Enough about the UPS man. I already know where its from by the address on the label Conde Nast. I rip it open and see the dating book everyone has been asking for. “Always Hit On the Wingman”. Yes, I've been privilege to get first dibs on and provide my ASK KIMBERLY point of view. Now all I need are some snacks.

First some back history on Jake...

For more than fifty years, Glamour magazine's Jake columnist has served as a dating consigliere for millions of American women. Now, in his trademark no-B.S. Voice, Jake offered this indispensable guide for women. What are men really thinking? Among many other secret girl questions, I wont go into great 411 about. Jake has shared a man point of view insight, since 1956.


ASK KIMBERLY point of view...


I grab the book & immediately got comfortable to read it. Cover to cover all 191 pages of it. Anything relationships I'm all in. Its in my nature... The joyful romantic Virgo. I hadn't even got to the contents page & Jake has me laughing histrionically with his intro page: For everyone woman who's ever worn edible lingerie, Facebook-stalked a guy, or gone to bed with her phone on (just in case) and thought: There's got to be a better way. ROTFL (Rolling on the floor laughing). I can only admit to one and that's sleeping with my cell in the bed. I do it all the time & not because I'm waiting on a call. I use it as my alarm to wake-up in addition to read my scriptures first thing in the a.m. That's my story & I'm sticking to it.


I'll Call You... (Is this you ladies~View link)

On to Jake story...


To give you an idea about who Jake is, he's quite similar to Carrie Bradshaw from Sex in the City. There are a few differences though. Jake is kept anonymous and Jake provides a male perspective for the ladies. Jake provides real life stories, suggestions & insights to do the dating thing better. The book is filled with Aha Moments on Why you should Hit On the Wingman...and 9 other Secret Rules for getting the love life you want. There is also an essential secret on achieving that. I won't give it away, but I totally agree with Jake. Let's just say I'm that girl. Every now & then I found myself in tears laughing, because I just cant believe what women will do all in the name of LOVE. Throughout the book Jake shared some insights, so I tweeted a few with all my tweeps. Here are a few of my favorites


1. The best men don't send expensive flowers (Don't be upset you must read. Jake is keeping it real Chivalry).


2. You've got to broadcast your personality. If you're a nerd, let your nerd flag fly.


3. If he seems like a throwback, that's because he is a throwback.


4. You should fart in front of your guy just once. Just so you have the monkey off your back. (Remember Jake said this not me). I was laughing to myself for a good five minutes after I read this one.


I would love to share more with you, but I like you to experience what I experienced. I can truly say I'm really glad I'm comfortable in my own skin. Once you become the true you. You can most certainly laugh about the silly things & not take life so seriously. Embracing love is an extraordinary moment that can last a lifetime. Discovering who you are first, while connecting with someone else regardless if its for a season or a lifetime. Just enjoy the footsteps as you fall. Just when you do make sure he's the right person to catch you.


PS... As I mentioned earlier in my review Jake has been around for fifty-six-year's. Now not sure if you really got what I was saying. However let me break it down. There have been over a dozen Jakes during the years. A big part of the deal of being Jake is Jake must be single. “Always Hit On the Wingman” was written by one of the most recent. Without giving to much I'm elated to say Jake has fallen and found the perfect girl to catch him. Honestly that was the best part of reading the Wingman. Never underestimate the wingman.

Until next time live FABULOUS...